Operational security limited what Curtis could tell his parents about his role in the war, which began Feb. 28 when the U.S. and Israel launched an attack on Iran. The couple spoke to him before his last mission.
“He was not allowed to really give much detail about where he was or what he was doing,” Matt said. “So, it was kind of just a basic talk about things that were going on back here in the community.”
The community has joined to console the grieving family. Curtis left behind a wife, Mary, and a younger sister, Jessica. Neighbors in Wilmington, Ohio, have been dropping off flowers and food. Lots of food: homemade chicken noodle soup and ribs and quiche and salads and breads and peaches.
A group has taken up a collection to plant a tree in their yard, any tree they’d like.
Curtis was one of the town’s standouts. A strong student with a capacious memory, he graduated with honors both from his local high school and the University of Cincinnati, where he got an aerospace engineering degree. He and Mary had been high school sweethearts, his mother said, and he proposed during a hike in Utah.
“He was a very friendly and outgoing person,” Matt said. “He could talk to anybody. He had this crazy ability to retain knowledge. He was very curious and researched things, and he could retain all that knowledge, and he could walk up to just about anybody and talk about anything. I don’t know how many times people would say to him, ‘How did you know that?’”
Planes were always a fascination. His grandmother knitted him a quilt with pictures of planes — something he kept on his bed growing up. He could look up at the sky and identify the type of plane flying overhead.
Curtis joined the military in 2015, taking basic training at Lackland Air Force Base in Texas. His last assignment was as part of the air refueling squadron at Rickenbacker Air National Guard Base, near Columbus.
At the gathering in Dover last week, the dignitaries “said they had read about our son and how we as parents had raised such an amazing young man,” Lisa said. “He was the top of his class in high school and college and in all the military training that he had. The Rickenbacker base said he had a very bright future.”
Trump has now attended two dignified transfers. After the first, on March 7, he told reporters that the message he got from the families was that the war was well worth fighting and winning.
They told him, “’Finish the job, sir,’” he recounted two days later in a Q&A with reporters.
A White House spokesperson, Olivia Wales, said in response to a request for comment: “President Trump and all Americans grieve for our fallen heroes who made the ultimate sacrifice for our nation. They represent the very best of our country — and President Trump will never forget their service and selfless devotion in support of the noble Operation Epic Fury.”
“At Dover Air Force Base, President Trump grieved with their families and expressed the enduring gratitude of our entire nation,” she added. “These men and women gave up their lives for this courageous mission that President Trump will complete to defend our freedom and eliminate the threats posed by the Iranian terrorist regime.”
A day after the dignified transfer on March 18, Hegseth held a news conference and said: “What I heard through tears, through hugs, through strength and through unbreakable resolve was the same from family after family. They said, ‘Finish this. Honor their sacrifice. Do not waver. Do not stop until the job is done.'”
One family member who met Hegseth that day, Charles Simmons, later told NBC News that he didn’t discuss the war’s merits with Hegseth and that the focus was primarily on his 28-year-old son, Tyler, who also died in the crash. Tyler had hoped to become a commercial pilot after finishing his military career. Charles Simmons said the president and Hegseth showed compassion for the loss of his only son.
For his part, Matt said that Hegseth’s recounting is “the type of feeling” that he conveyed at Dover.
The Pentagon’s chief spokesman, Sean Parnell, said in a statement: “Secretary Hegseth has the utmost respect for our Gold Star families and has pledged to honor the sacrifice of their loved ones. While at Dover, the secretary spoke with each family of our fallen heroes and the details of each individual conversation remain private.”
Asked about the war, Matt told NBC News: “I just have faith that they know what they’re doing and are doing it for a good reason. We’ll never know all the information that they’ve been making their decisions on. So I just hope it’s all worth it.”
Said Lisa: “I’m a mother who lost her son. We loved him for 30 years, and no mother or father or sister or family member should lose a child. You’re just heartbroken, and he’ll always be our little boy playing with airplanes in our backyard.”
She added that Curtis “made the highest sacrifice — his life. I’m not one to really follow a lot of politics. But I’ve always loved and supported every branch of our military. So, I would hope this would soon be resolved and all our military are brought back home safely.”
Mentioning the black ribbons that neighbors affixed to the mailbox in front of their home, Lisa’s voice caught.
“I would have so wanted yellow ribbons,” she said.